Category: Property

I was out surveying a lovely mid-Victorian semi over in Chawton last Tuesday—sturdy brickwork, proper sash windows, the sort of place that’s stood the test of time—when I spotted it. There, pushing through a hairline crack in the driveway with the quiet persistence of a debt collector, was a cluster of those bright, heart-shaped leaves. […]

I remember standing on a ladder outside a lovely little cottage near Sevenoaks back in ’94, squinting up at a ridge that looked more like a pile of damp hay than a proper roof. The estate agent was busy talking about “period charm” and “characterful features,” but I wasn’t listening to the sales pitch; I […]

I remember standing in a draughty hallway in a mid-Victorian terrace near Salisbury back in ’94, watching a homeowner point at a tiny hairline fracture with a look of pure terror. They’d spent a small fortune on a “specialist structural assessment” that essentially told them what I could see from the kerb: the clay soil […]

I remember standing in a damp hallway in a mid-Victorian semi near Salisbury back in ’98, watching a young couple’s faces fall as the solicitor pulled out a dusty bundle of papers. They had spent months saving for that house, only to find out a clause from 1924 meant they couldn’t even park a commercial […]

I remember standing in a drafty hallway in a mid-Victorian cottage near Hungerford last autumn, listening to a young couple talk about “character” and “heritage” as if they were buying a piece of art rather than a pile of damp brick and lime mortar. They had no idea that the very thing they loved—that beautiful, […]

I remember a young couple, the Millers, who moved into that lovely 1930s semi-detached over on Church Lane last autumn. They were so caught up in the excitement of the new kitchen that they didn’t give a second thought to the paperwork, choosing the cheapest option available when weighing up a homebuyers survey vs building […]

I remember standing in a draughty hallway in a mid-Victorian semi near Upper Slaughter, listening to a young man in a sharp suit explain that a survey was merely a “comprehensive structural audit for risk mitigation.” I nearly choked on my tea. People often get caught up in the jargon, wondering exactly what does a […]